transitionsRecently I was invited to look at life transitions, from an unusual perspective.  It was moving and illuminating.

Normally we think of birth, the in between time, and then the inevitable death as the natural flow of significant transitions.  But John Davis, a clear and profound Diamond Approach scholar, teacher, and mentor, suggests that it’s helpful to start with death and work back through the generally messy, chaotic, in between time to a new birth.  Hmmm.  Interesting!

As I explored for myself, several transitions shifted into focus — aspects of my marriage (no physical death at this point, but definitely the death of certain ways of being together), or my aging body, activism, or my connection to my music teacher.

But the transition that I delved into most deeply was my long, slow, but perceptible and palpable, transition from my efficient, brisk (even brusque), speedy, multi-tasking, kinda superficial, generally happy but deeply judgemental, and yes, rather self-focussed way of being, to a new and very different self that has been emerging — incrementally, over many years now.  A sometimes slower, softer, kinder, to self and others, more focussed, less darting, less bent on getting it done (whatever it was), to enjoying the doing, or not even the doing, just the enjoying, of the moment. Transitions

Symbols emerged.  I saw my former self as a butterfly, often unconscious, but lightly flitting from one flower to another.  Quite productive, beautiful in her way.

It was fruitful and moving to drop into the exploration — playfully, honestly, with curiosity and compassion.  As John suggests, in the death part of a transition, there is loss and sadness.  I mourned the loss of innocence, the energy, the flow, the — many, much, more, quality of the butterfly.   (I am a 7 on the Enneagram, which explains a lot, if you know this system!)

I won’t go into the full territory of the death and loss, or the chaos and mixed feelings, attitudes, confusion of the in between time, which is, to some degree still happening.  I’ll conclude by sharing the image that arose to describe the feeling of the birth of new way of being:  I am becoming a deep well — bottomless, mysterious, nourishing, clear, full of richness and resources for the new ways of being, living, growing.

TransitionsFrom Butterfly to Bottomless Well!  I am still having fun exploring the dimensions of this Life Transition, and I invite you to pick one, or several, or your own, and play around.

You might enjoy John Davis’ on-line course, Life Transitions.   There are indeed many challenges, but also allies on the path, and through our transitions,large and small.  I’d love to hear what you find!

Jill Schroder is the author of BECOMING: Journeying Toward Authenticity.  BECOMING is an invitation for self-reflection, and to mine our memorable moments for insights, meaning, and growth.  Check the website for a sample chapter, or see the reviews to get a flavor for the volume.  Follow me on Twitter, let’s be friends on Facebook :-) 

Share this: